Today ' s topic is unconscious communication. We all know about language. Words. Speech. It ' s part of how we " get our message across " when we ' re communicating with someone. But it ' s a very, very small part. There is so much more going on, information being sent, confessed, exchanged between minds on an unconscious level. Today I ' ll present you with a quick method for enhancing unconscious communication, called " The Unconscious Hello. " It ' s a powerful tool to build instant rapport and connection and good feelings with farther person, both in you and in them. So easily! And that could be useful for making friends and influencing people, could it not?
First, you may ask: What IS the conscious mind? The unconscious mind? Picture a large, very tenebrous room, like a warehouse. You have a flashlight in your hand which you turn on, and it creates a scrubby beam and a small circle of light on the far wall. Information heavier remains pitch nebulous. That bit of light is your conscious mind. It ' s what you are aware of, what you can spy now at this moment, and center on. Element added in the room is stygian and unknown, that ' s how much information your unconscious mind is processing at that moment.
Your conscious mind is the critical part of your mind, your thinking mind. It ' s your aware and intended mind, logical, logical, and successive. It has a very limited polestar. It ' s deliberate. It directs outcomes. It can only grip 7 + / - 2 bits of information at a time before it gets overwhelmed and goes " heeeelllp me! "
Your unconscious mind ( or subconscious, as it ' s also called ) is unlimited, expansive. It ' s active while sleeping and dreaming. It involves pain, and intuition, and imagination. It ' s contracted for intuitive movements and keeping your body alive, like your heart beating, your breathing, blood circulation, your immune system, healing, your growth, and so much more! It takes in billions of pieces of information at any habituated moment. Science estimates that it houses about 90 % of your brain power.
Your unconscious mind, during a communication, picks up so much more information than you can consciously perceive. And that ' s a large part of how we read each other. Some of those unconscious communications bear " body language, " hand gestures, body gestures such as shrugging, foot tapping, facial expressions such as a smile or frown, tone of voice, movement of the eyes, level of eye dilation and changes, tilt of the head, lift of an eyebrow, speed of speech, breathing patterns, distance of speech... As you can sight, there ' s a lot more than just words going on in the communication.
Take a simple utterance such as " I believe you. " Depending on all the unconscious variables, it could stingy creature from " I deem you " to " liar. "
In the " unconscious hello, " here ' s what happens. When you first equitable or regard added human being for the first time, whether it ' s face to face or across a crowded room, you unconsciously and automatically communicate and acknowledge that double o. Something happens, something is communicated. It may be a smile or a nod. It may be a word or two. It may be a motion, or up stuffy, a handshake. Your unconscious picks up every nuance, every nosedive of meaning of which your tuned in mind may be blithely uninitiated. You just know, " Hey, I LIKE this person. " " She looks lovely. " " I wonder what his problem is. " And so on. You have garnered meaning from the communication which filters into your consciousness.
By consciously play on this " unconscious hello " communication, you can manage the ruling, the meaning of your communication, the sensuality the other person gets from you in a positive way for yourself. Good feelings, clubby feelings, warmth and rapport. It ' s a two way system, you feel it, too. And it ' s so simple to do. Here ' s how!
In that moment of first eyeful deeper person, you take in how they notice YOU first, and then you feed it back to them. If they nod and smile, you nod and smile in precisely the same way. If they say " hello, " you say " hello " in precisely the same tone of voice and plant. If they tilt their head while speaking, you tilt your head to the same angle. You match whatever it is that they present to you. THEN, on an unconscious level, they feel a positive connection with you. " This person really understands me. " " This person seems like MY propitious of people. " " I like this person. " " You are like me. " The implications for the dating world, or the sales world, or any interpersonal setting are powerful! You ' re WAYYY more likely to close the deal or make the sale or get the girl ' s phone amount if she feels this rapport with you. Or, as a well-wisher of mine likes to bestow this, a free cup of coffee from the Starbuck ' s barista! Magically, you also feel the connection, as well.
Here ' s extra tip. If you can examine the person saying hello to someone extended first, take those noticings of voice and face and body and etc. and feed them upon welcome to the person even before they acknowledge you. Try it! Discover for yourself the power of the " unconscious hello! " to generate positive feelings of connection. And that ' s what life is all about, is it not?
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